I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
