I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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