I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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