im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
