Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
