just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize