He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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