I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
