Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Its about making memories worth repressing
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize