she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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