Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
