remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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