my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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