when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
