after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
My breasts were aching with rage.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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