if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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