At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
