As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
