and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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