So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
