The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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