just tell him i said nine months
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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