she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
