Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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