i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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