I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize