is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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