You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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