Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
