chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize