Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Are these your boobs on my camera?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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