No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
