I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
