ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
