there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
