Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
