NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
