He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
