DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
