She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Randomize
