I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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