she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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