i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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