I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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