she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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