No, drunk sperm still make babies.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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