So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
