she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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