Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
if only i could text you this smell
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
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