Are we in a gay sports bar?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
